


When Things Start Splitting at the Seams and Now (The Whole Thing's Tumbling Down)

by twentyonelimes (MaplePastaBurgers)



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: M/M, also pete andy joe and hayley, patrick and jenna are in this for a few paragraphs, this is the worst thing ever omg, tyler is an angel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-12
Updated: 2015-07-15
Packaged: 2018-04-08 22:40:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4323525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaplePastaBurgers/pseuds/twentyonelimes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tyler is an angel who is supposed to see to it that a human named Josh dies and goes to Heaven. The only problem is that Tyler makes a mistake, and he really can't say he regrets it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. prologue

**Author's Note:**

> title is from "no one's gonna love you" by band of horses b/c i'm one of those emo nerds who uses lyrics as titles. there is death mentioned in this so please be careful, also two swears in next chapter. this is my very first twenty one pilots fanfiction. not to mention my first band-related fanfic, so please be aware that this might totally suck. that's it really. enjoy!

The first thing Tyler noticed about Joshua-who-according-to-the-viewing-angel-goes-by-Josh was the man’s bright pink hair. And then he noticed how the light shone brightly in his eyes. Tyler turned back to Emanuel. “And the big man asked you to tell me to bring this guy to Heaven?”

The other angel nodded. “That’s right. His time is near. In fact, he has roughly five days, three hours, and four minutes left. It’d be best to send you down today to make sure everything will be in order when the time comes.”

“Right,” Tyler looked blankly back and forth a few times between Emanuel and the human laying on the grass down below, “this guy is supposed to die.”

“You say that’s like it’s a question,” Emanuel observed.

Tyler shrugged his shoulders, his wings shaking in an indignant manner. “Not really, no.”

“You did,” Emanuel states flatly.

“Okay, maybe I did,” Tyler rolled his eyes. “So what? His eyes just look so… alive. He looks like he’s supposed to be living. He belongs there on Earth.”

“Tyler…,” Emanuel began to warn.

“Look, all I’m saying is that Josh seems perfectly fine staying on Earth for a couple more decades. You know that’s, like, pretty soon in angel time,” Tyler continued.

“Yes, but he is not an angel. And, Tyler, you’ve never had this problem before,” Emanuel flaps his wings twice, and Tyler holds back a nervous shudder. Tyler can feel relief wash over him when Emanuel’s wing tuck quietly back into their place under his shoulder blades. “What is the difference with this mortal?”

Sighing, Tyler turned to look back down at Josh who was now asleep, bright eye hidden behind pale eyelids. “Honestly? I don’t know, ‘Manuel. He just looks unprepared. And don’t start with the, ‘But what God says is the only truth.’ I know it is. I just wish this time it wasn’t. He can’t be ready so soon.”

Emanuel’s face softened as he placed a comforting hand on Tyler’s shoulder. “I am aware of how hard it gets sometimes. I remember when I had to do what you did. Multiple times I would watch all the little humans go about their daily business knowing one day I would be there to take them away. Also multiple times have I gone to Father to ask him to spare them. Not because I thought they’d be happier living on Earth than in heaven because they appeared so young and naive. Only now do I realise that’s why Father wants us to take them. He knows they will make wonderful additions to Heaven.

“Still pure and true, not rotten and unappealing with sin. Of course, even the ones who have sinned and repented are beautiful, I cannot tell whether or not they are clean. I merely listen to Father. I do not make the choices.”

About halfway through Emanuel’s small speech, Tyler stopped listening. No matter what, he couldn’t bring himself to agree with his fellow angel. Josh seemed to fit in so well with the ways of the Earth below. Tyler couldn’t help but think that Josh would do better down on the Earth than in Heaven. He needed the interaction of people of all types. Not just the simple angels. Tyler shook his head. “I’m sorry, Emanuel. You’re right. Father knows what is best for everyone. I suppose I should get going now?”

Emanuel’s face brightened, and he quickly removed his hand from Tyler’s shoulder. “Ah, yes! Of course!” Tyler could feel the happiness radiating off of him in waves. “I’ll let you get going. Good luck. And remember,” he gripped Tyler’s hands, “do not let temptation get to you.” He leaned close to Tyler. “ _He_ will do anything to get to you.” Emanuel pulled away suddenly before smiling brightly once more. “You’ll do great. May God be with you!” He winked before flying away.

Tyler nervously rubbed his hands together. “May God be with me,” he repeated. “Oh, brother.”


	2. chapter one

When Tyler set foot on Earth, it was about 2:20 pm. Luckily, Josh was still where he was five minutes ago. Tyler nervously walked up. “H-Hi,” he stuttered out quietly. Josh didn’t move. “Excuse me?” Tyler spoke louder. Josh jerked awake.

“Don’t take my money _please_!” the man gasped.

Tyler stared owlishly at him. “I beg your pardon?”

Josh turned his head to look at him. “Who are you?”

“Oh! Um, I’m Tyler. I’m… new here. I just thought you could help me find my apartment? I sort of forgot where to go,” Tyler willed a blush to his cheeks, silently thanking his Father for a quick yet reasonable mind and good acting skills.

Josh looked slightly panicked before slowly nodding. “Uh, yeah, man. Just tell me the address, and I’ll do my best.”

Tyler began to frantically nod as he dug around in his sweatshirt and jeans pockets for the slip of paper on which he wrote the address to the apartment he would be staying in for his short amount of time on Earth. He finally found it and handed it to Josh, who proceeded to read it aloud: “1520 Starlight Avenue, Apt 608, Floor 5, Room 3C.” He paused for a second before laughing. “You’re my next door neighbour, huh?”

“Really?” Tyler questioned, feigning shock. “What a coincidence. Guess we better get used to each other, yeah?”

Laughing once more (and Tyler totally not thinking Josh’s laugh was even better than anything he’d heard in Heaven), Josh nodded. “Oh yeah. Good for me you don’t seem to be all that bad of a guy.”

Tyler chuckled awkwardly, realising in that moment that this was the man he was supposed to make sure would be dead in a few days. “Wow, man, thanks. You too. I mean, you don’t seem bad yourself.”

“Awesome,” Josh smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling, turning them into almost-slits. “So just follow me. We can walk there. That’s actually how I got here. I like to stay fit.” He winked.

Tyler could feel a true blush surfacing. “Same here actually. Did you know I use to play basketball?”

Josh let out a low whistle. “Sweet. I’m more of a soccer-maybe-a-bit-of-running guy though.”

“Really? Got any other things you can do?” Tyler smiled.

“Yeah, I do actually,” Josh grinned. “I may or may not play drums for fun. I like to think I’m pretty good at them.”

Tyler tilted his head to the side just a fraction of an inch. “H’m. I guess I’ll have to hear you play sometime?”

Josh released a laugh that did _not_ bring Tyler to his knees as he shrugged. “If you’re willing, dude. You call the shots.”

And all over again did Tyler realise that he was only there to make sure the beautiful human being walking beside died on time.

Tyler gave a microscopic shake of his head. That wasn’t important yet. For now, he could pretend he was a regular person who was just becoming a friend of Josh’s. Of course, that was technically what he was supposed to be doing, but there was some extra baggage with that job. Tyler jumped when Josh’s placed a hand on his shoulder. “Dude, we’re here.”

The building was tall, light-coloured stone made up the wall of the ground floor. Tyler could see the clean tile inside the building, and a few people milling about, whether it be to go into a room down a hall or waiting for an elevator. Josh gave Tyler a small nudge. “C’mon. You aren’t think I’ve lead you to the wrong building, right? There’s no way you’d have that little trust in me.”

Tyler laughed and was about to pull open the door, but a man dressed in a nice outfit opened the doors for him. He blushed lightly and thanked him, still chuckling slightly at Josh. He stopped when he saw Josh staring at him. He could feel a small worry begin to expand in his stomach. “What?” he questioned, crossing his arms defensively.

Josh merely smiled. “You’re a bit odd. Not that I mind, I’m a bit odd too.” He brought his face closer to Tyler’s. “If I’m being honest, and I am, we’re all a bit odd.”

Tyler rolled his eyes. “Right.”

Josh gave a haughty laugh before pressing the button with the up arrow on the wall in between the elevators. The one on the left dinged before the doors slid open. Both men stepped into the small room. Tyler pressed the button for floor five and the doors shut.

“So tell me, Tyler,” Josh began, “what do you do? Do you have a job?”

Tyler froze. “I…,” different occupations flashed before his eyes before he spluttered out his favorite hobby, “am a songwriter. More of a poet really. So yeah, it’s sort of a job.”

Josh opened his mouth to speak, but at that exact moment the elevator dinged once more, and the doors opened. Tyler smiled at Josh before quickly exiting and walking to his temporary home. He didn’t bother with the key and willed the door open, praying to his Father that Josh wouldn’t notice.

After shutting the door behind him, Tyler ran his hands through his hair, sinking to the floor, keeping both hands over his head. “I’m supposed to watch him die,” his voice came out scratchy, more a collection of whimpers than words. “I am supposed to watch him die.”

He felt a few tears slip out. Sniffling, he wiped a hand over his nose before standing shakily. Looking at the time on his microwave, he saw it was about three pm. Cars honked and beeped and released a thousand other noises from the streets below. Tyler waked over to the floor-to-ceiling windows. The curtains were pulled tightly shut. He waved his hands in an outward motion, and they flew to the farthest spots on their rods, the strings attached to them tying on their own.

Tyler pressed himself as close as he could to the windows. His eyes moved along with the vehicles below. He took in the different assortment of people. Each and every one of them had a different background, a different future; he wondered which ones he’d have to look after.

A harsh knock on his door brought him out of his darkening thoughts. Tyler shuffled over to the door, opening it just a hair. He opened it fully when he saw that it was Josh.

“Hi,” Josh said, the colour in his cheeks vibrant. “I was wondering if you’d like to go to this one coffee shop with me tomorrow.”

Tyler stared at him blankly.

Josh released a strangled groan. “Do you want to go to a place with me tomorrow sometime?”

“Oh,” Tyler spoke. “Yeah. I’d love to. Sorry about that. Where is it?”

“I’ll just come over here and we can walk there together,” Josh smiled.

Tyler nodded. “That’ll work. What time?”

“Ten-thirty, maybe?” the other man suggested.

“Yeah. That’s awesome,” Tyler agreed.

Josh grinned, “Sick,” before turning around and heading back to his apartment.

Tyler gave a small laugh before shutting his door and heading back over to the windows.


	3. chapter two

The next day had begun. Tyler had a sleepless night. Not because of the fact that angels never needed sleep (well, that was part of the reason), but rather because of the fact that oh no Josh is supposed to die in four days. Four days. Tyler did not like that.

Around ten thirty am, a knock broke through the quiet of Tyler’s temporary housing. Tyler willed his outfit to change into something different from what he wore the day before as he made his way to the door. He looked through the peephole and saw bright pink. He smiled when he opened the door. “Josh,” he smiled brightly, “hey. Coffee shop time.”

“Yeah,” a light pink coloured across his cheeks, “coffee shop time. Are you sure you want to go with me? Like, you don’t _have_ to go. I really didn’t want to make you feel pressured or anything yesterday, you know?”

Tyler bit back a laugh and instead went for a soft smile. “Yeah, I know, and I’m sure. I’d love to go to a café with you. If you lead the way like you said you would.”

That pulled a nervous chuckle from the male standing across from him. “Sure thing. Er… thanks for saying yes. Um, yeah, let’s go.”

“Alright.”

Josh turned in the direction of the elevators before pausing. “Do you have everything you need?”

Tyler’s smile stretched farther across his face before responding: “Yeah. Let’s go.”

;;

“So you write songs?” Josh asked with wide eyes. Those huge, bright, alive eyes that Tyler enjoyed so much. Ugh. The angel wanted to bang his head on the table until his head cracked open. Of course, that wouldn’t do much damage because his body would automatically mend itself, but the thought was all the same.

Tyler felt his wings want to be released from where they were hidden under his shoulder blades, but he ignored the feeling. He only felt that because he felt awkward and nervous. Why? He wasn’t too sure. After releasing a small breath, Tyler nodded. “Used to is more of the truth. I wrote them mainly out of boredom,” he paused, “sort of. Looking back on it now. I think I wrote them more because I was often alone with my thoughts where I used to live. I think they’re somewhere in my apartment... maybe by my bed.”

Josh’s eyes widened. “You don’t know where they are? But aren’t songs, like… they sound so important. Especially after you said you wrote them because you were alone with your thoughts a lot. Songs,” Josh smiled, “you can tell a lot about a person from the songs they write. Or, at least, by how they sing them.”

Tyler’s eyes widened. “Oh.” He was shocked at Josh’s keen observation. Whilst Josh was pretty, Tyler didn’t expect him to make such introspective observations. “You’re right. Um, so how’s your drink?”

Josh laughed. “Hey, don’t worry. We don’t have to talk about your songs if you don’t want to. And my drink is good, thanks. Yours?”

Tyler took a tentative sip, having never tasted coffee before. His nose scrunched up quickly. He took a longer drink, letting the strange yet oddly smooth taste spread over his tongue. He swallowed slowly before nodding. “It’s pretty good. I enjoy it.”

Josh smiled. “That’s nice. My friend actually owns this place. It’s the only one in existence. His name is Patrick, he works here with his, um, friend, Pete. Oh. And speak of the devil…”

Tyler’s eyebrows went up at the words. What about Lucifer? Emanuel warned him to stay away from him, and he normally did. He always did, but if Josh had some ties to—a short man with glasses and a fedora perched atop his head walked up to their table. He smiled, soft and gentle. “Hi, Josh,” he greeted. “Who’s this?”

Josh smiled back. “This is Tyler. He’s my new neighbor.”

The man faced Tyler fully. “Hey, Tyler. Josh’s neighbor, huh? That’s cool. He’s a chill neighbor to have. Not to mention the fact that he treats his guys right.” He winked.

Tyler felt heat rise in his cheeks, but he didn’t know why. “Oh. That’s, uh, good to know.”

Patrick laughed (like his smile, that was soft and gentle, almost like a hug made out of sound). “I’m just messing with you. Josh is a good guy though. That’s true. He’s got a good heart.”

Tyler nodded carefully. “Yeah,” he said, “a good heart.” A good enough heart for God to want him to be up in Heaven, he added silently. Tyler perked up suddenly. “Josh said you run this shop with your friend Pete? Is he here today?”

Patrick sent an accusatory look at Josh when Tyler said friend, but he smiled and nodded when Tyler finished his questions. “Yeah. He’s just busy helping Andy and Joe make drinks. They’re the other workers. Hey, do you mind if I speak with Josh for a second?”

Tyler shook his head. “I don’t mind.”

Patrick smiled gratefully before walking off with Josh quietly trailing behind him. Feeling only slightly guilty, Tyler heightened his sense of hearing just enough to hear Patrick and Josh and not any noise from other places.

“Look, Patrick, I’m sorry,” he heard Josh say, “but you know how people are these days. What if he is… you know?”

Tyler continued to listen as Patrick released a sigh. “I know, but Tyler seems like a good enough guy, and I told you to stop lying for us. The world isn’t as conservative as it used to be.” Tyler sipped some more at his coffee and willed the sugar packets to rearrange themselves in color order as he heard Patrick continue: “I know you’re looking out for us, Josh, but some people are just assholes. You really don’t have to lie for us. Thank you though.”

“I just,” Josh took a breath, “Tyler seems like a really, really good person, and I’m scared that telling the truth will lead to disappointment. That he really is…”

Tyler heard Patrick draw a breath. “I know, Josh. I know. But he agreed to come with you here today, right? That’s got to count for something.” Tyler smiled. Patrick seemed like a good person. He sounded like a good judge of character. Very wise. Tyler kept the smile on his face as he instead made the sugar packets disappear. Patrick let out another breath. “Just tell him the truth, alright? If he reacts badly, tell him to fuck a cactus or something.” Tyler’s eyes widened at that. He’d heard cursing on other trips to Earth but never that vulgar. He tried to stop the blush spreading across his face as he instead focused on making the sugar packets reappear.

Josh and Patrick arrived at the table a second later. Patrick smiled down at Tyler. “You’re a cool dude, Tyler. You’re a cool dude.”

Tyler smiled back. “You too, Patrick. Really.” His smile widened the tiniest bit before he turned to Josh. “So far I like your choices in friends.”

Josh groaned. “You’ve only met the sensible one. Wait until you meet his boyfriend.”

Tyler could tell then that both Josh and Patrick sat with baited breath. He ignored the urge to roll his eyes at their worry. Instead he laughed. “Did Patrick set my expectations too high?”

Almost immediately the tension left the group. Josh let out a nervous chuckle, and Tyler pretended he didn’t notice the smug-yet-more-relieved smile Patrick sent Josh. “Yeah,” Josh chuckled once more. “Way too high.”

They talked a bit more after that, and at one point, Pete even went over to their table. And if Tyler thought Patrick was vulgar, he didn’t even know what Pete was. He didn’t mind exactly, he just felt like the swears were very foreign to his ears.

Pete was pretty nice too though. Sure, he cursed a lot, but he was good at heart.

;;

“I enjoyed it, Josh, really,” Tyler laughed. “I still think your friends are cool. The only problem here is you.” At that, Josh gave him a harsh shove causing another laugh to bubble in Tyler’s throat. “No, you’re great too. You really are.” He sent him a small smile.

Josh gave a smile back. “Thanks. You too.”

They fell into a comfortable silence after that.

;;

When they stopped in front of their apartment building, Tyler turned to Josh. “Do you really want to go back home?”

Josh paused, looking up the building before meeting Tyler’s eyes once more. “Nah.”

“Would you like to go to the park?”

“Sure.”

;;

At the park, they sat where they first met.

“Josh?” Tyler asked. “Has someone ever taken your money?”

“No.”

“Oh. Then why did you—”

“In case you were trying to take my money.”

“That makes sense.”

“Have you ever had something stolen from you?”

Tyler froze. “I… don’t know. I guess my life was sort of stolen from me.”

Josh opened his eyes and propped himself up on his elbows. “What?”

“I’ve never really had much time to live,” Tyler explained.

“Not even as a kid?”

“I didn’t really have much of a childhood,” Tyler said. “I had to watch out for my siblings, and we had a lot of chores to do. We never had much time to play or anything.”

“Oh,” Josh breathed. “I’m sorry.”

Tyler looked over at the man. “You don’t need to apologise.”

“Too late,” Josh joked lightly.

That caused a quiet giggle from Tyler. “My gosh.”

Josh simply shrugged his shoulders. “Can’t help it. Comedian at birth.”

“Not drummer?” Tyler prodded his side.

“That too,” Josh smiled.

;;

By the time they were done talking, the sun was setting.

“I like the sunset,” Josh stated at one point. “It’s like someone spilt paint all over the sky.”

Tyler tilted his head. “That’s a beautiful way to put it.”

“Yeah.”


	4. chapter three

Josh had three days left.

And he was so unaware.

Tyler wanted to pretend he was just a regular person, someone who was merely friends with Josh, and completely unaware of what would be happening in a couple of days. Sometimes it worked, but then Josh would do something so _Josh_ , and Tyler would be reminded all over again. It was a torturous pattern that he wanted to get out of.

That morning, Josh invited a few friends over to his place. He introduced Tyler to each and everyone of them. It hurt so bad when they all showed their different quirks and how well they all came together. Josh had true friends. And just like they did in the morning, they’d all come together when Josh was no longer alive.

Tyler also felt horrible because he wouldn’t be there with them. Once Josh died, he’d go back to Heaven to wait for his next assignment. He truly hated his job. It wasn’t fair. He’d been an angel for one thousand plus years. He should’ve had a different job by then. Maybe not because God decided he wanted him to do something else, but because of the billions upon billions of job change requests he’d pleaded to Father.

He still smiled through the little get together though, and still said hello to each and every person there. He chatted with Patrick and Pete, and even got closer to a few of Josh’s other friends. They were all great human beings.

When everyone left, and it was just him and Josh, he ran out and into his own apartment. He quickly searched through his things before he found them: his songs. He thumbed through them quickly, each and every song accounted for and in his hold. He swallowed before nodding to himself.

Tyler ran back into Josh’s apartment and almost barreled into the man himself. Tyler straightened himself up. “Sorry, I just… I wanted to show you these.” He shoved the papers into Josh’s hands.

Josh gulped. “All of them?”

Tyler nodded. “Yes.”

“But aren’t these, like, really personal?”

Tyler nodded. “Yes.

“And you want me to read them?”

Tyler nodded. “Yes.”

Josh stared down at the papers in his hands before a smile crept onto his face. “Thank you, Tyler.”

“You’re welcome. Just bring them back whenever,” and with that, Tyler quietly left the apartment, leaving Josh alone with _his_ thoughts.

;;

Tyler released a quiet sigh. “I trust people too quickly. It can’t be healthy. I just… I get attached. I don’t mean to or anything. And you’d really expect me not to. Especially with my job. After so long… after so many years, decades, centuries… after all this time, you’d expect me to be completely emotionless.”

“Or a bit too emotional,” a feminine voice interrupted his. Tyler turned his head to see Jenna, a fellow angel, sitting atop his dresser. Her soft, creme-colored wings flapped quietly, lulling Tyler into a calm state of mind. “Tyler, I know what your job is. I know it’s hard. Don’t think I don’t see you writing those songs. You’re more broken than any human alive. Your job is really truly hard. I see you crying, spilling your heart out onto those pages. It’s beautifully depressing.” She paused and looked at his wall. “He’s crying right now. Reading your words.”

Tyler lethargically sent her a glance. “I’m sorry.”

Jenna laughed, a sweet, honey-smooth melody filling the air. “It’s okay, Ty. They’re happy tears, you know? Proud tears. Maybe sad tears. But do you know why? Tyler, it’s because your words are amazing. Your words _are_ beautiful. Awe-inspiring. They’re so, so… they’re so you. Your heart, your soul. Your words are beautiful.”

“Enough to bring Josh to tears,” Tyler whined mournfully. “I just want to protect him.”

Jenna clicked her tongue and padded towards him, running her fingers through his hair soothingly once she reached him, steadily bringing them down and around his head to cup his cheek, long fingers smooth and soft against his damp skin. “I know, Ty. I know. Sometimes you have to do things you don’t want to do, and that sucks. I know.” She willed a tissue into her hand from the box on the other side of the room. She handed it to Tyler. He blew his nose, and she sent it into the waste bin near the door. “It really doesn’t get easier.”

Tyler tensed. “You know?”

Jenna smiled softly. “It was once my job too, Ty. It still is honestly. I’m just on a lengthy break right now. The amount of people I’ve had to though… the amount of people I’ve had to… it’s a lot of people. Just know that. And I honestly don’t think they should’ve died. They really shouldn’t have.” She paused. “I’m sorry, Tyler. I’m not the right person to give comfort.” She stood up abruptly, causing Tyler to grip her arm.

“No!” he cried. “No. You are. You’re comforting. You really are. It’s nice.”

Jenna smiled. “Goodnight, Ty,” she pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Angels don’t normally need sleep, but tonight, I think you do.”

Tyler tightened his grip. “Stay.”

Jenna frowned. “That’s not safe.”

“I need you to stay,” Tyler pleaded.

“Tyler…,” Jenna attempted to pull her arm from his hold. It didn’t loosen. “Tyler!” she yelled. “Let go!” He released her, bringing his hand to his chest and cradling it as if burnt.

“I-I’m sorry,” he croaked. “I don’t… I didn’t mean… I’m sorry.”

A frown formed on the other angel’s face, a strange look on her beautiful features. “No, Tyler. I’m—”

“Please don’t apologise,” Tyler rolled over onto his side, facing away from her. “I think it’s time for you to go now.”

“Ty, no. You’re under a lot of stress, I shouldn’t have yelled. I’m at fault here,” Jenna tried to apologise anyways.

Tyler shook his head, his hands slowly gripping the hair at the top of his head. “I’m losing my mind, Jenna.”

“Ty—”

“Just stay with me until I fall asleep.”

 

 


	5. chapter four

When Tyler woke in the morning, the first thing he noticed was the note on his dresser.

_You fell asleep. -Jenna_

Tyler wondered if that shouldn’t have made him cry so much.

Josh had two days left. Tyler wanted to vomit. The sound of the lock on his door clicking startled him from his spot at the small table he had. He set his uneaten toast back on his plate and stared at the door. It creaked open to reveal Josh. Tyler looked back down at his toast.

“You left your key at my apartment,” was the first thing Josh said.

Tyler merely shrugged. “Keep it. I have a spare.” He’d have to thank Jenna later.

Josh slipped the key into his pocket before pulling two small boxes out of his pants pockets. “So I was thinking you could color my hair.”

Tyler shrugged once more. “Okay. I’ve never done it before, but I can try.”

Josh frowned. “Are you alright, Tyler? You sound out of it.”

Tyler rested his head on the table. “I wish I was out of it.”

“What? Why?” Josh sat down in the other chair.

“I’m not allowed to tell anyone,” Tyler replied. “I’ll still color your hair though. What color will it be this time?”

“Blue.”

“Okay.”

;;

The process of coloring Josh’s hair was actually quite fun and distracting. Also a bit intimate. It was weird. Tyler was currently brushing a creamy blue-colored substance into Josh’s hair. “Just lather it in,” Josh said as Tyler was tentatively dipping the brush in the mush. It had been about fifteen or so minutes since then, and now Josh was telling Tyler a story about something his friend Hayley did two years ago. Tyler laughed and tried to ignore the pangs he felt in his chest as he did so.

By the time Josh finished his anecdote, Tyler finished his hair. Josh smiled brightly. “Great! Now we just wait for it to set, and then we rinse it out.”

“Oh,” Tyler said, “okay.”

;;

Josh with blue hair was a cute Josh. Tyler blatantly stared as Josh admired his hair in the mirror. “You know,” he began, turning to Tyler, “for someone who’s never colored hair, you did a good job.”

Tyler blushed. “Thank you. It was an experience.”

Josh laughed.

;;

They didn’t do much for the rest of the day. They didn’t even leave Tyler’s apartment. At one point, Josh gave Tyler a key to his apartment. “It’s only fair,” he had said. Other than that, their activities had mainly consisted of Tyler moping, Josh staring at his hair in a mirror, grabbing food from Tyler’s fridge, watching television, and more of Tyler moping.

Tyler hated being sad on one of Josh’s last days on Earth, but he couldn’t bring himself to feel much of anything else. He could tell Josh was trying to make him smile, with the way he’d suddenly pop up behind him and drop some sweet in the angel’s lap, tap his nose with his index finger, try to start a conversation about the television show they were watching, usually by making fun of the events on the show. It was all a great effort, and Tyler wanted to smile and laugh and make fun of the shows on TV back, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t. He couldn’t. He couldn’t. He _couldn’t_.

And that made him feel like a horrible person. Which, considering the circumstances he was constantly put in, made more sense than his usual cheery self.

He knew the last time he got into one of his weird funks, Jenna had to get him back to Heaven, but that last time was a long time ago and not because of some irrelevant mortal.

Tyler wanted to punch himself in the face.

At one point he almost turned to Josh to tell him everything, but then Josh turned to look excitedly at him, with bright mocha eyes, all teeth showing in a grin, tongue poking out slightly, and Tyler couldn’t. Of course he couldn’t.

Tyler couldn’t even give a cryptic warning without wanting to cry. He couldn’t bring himself to say, “Stay safe.” He couldn’t bring himself to say, “Everything’ll be okay.” He just sat, staring blankly at the windows, the curtains still wide open from the first day he arrived.

The first day seemed like forever ago. The only thing he knew about Josh was his eyes. How alive they were. Now everything about Josh was alive.

He should’ve been sent down on Josh’s last day. Then he could keep on with his existence in peace.

When the sun began to fall from it’s spot in the sky, Josh looked at Tyler with a small smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah? Things’ll be better then, yeah?”

Tyler couldn’t answer.

Josh left the room silently. the door the only one to cause noise.

Tyler felt himself deflate. The small amount of energy he held within flew out with his breath. A gasp for air broke past his lips. Coughs racked through him, his entire body shuddering. His shoulders ached. He slipped off his shirt, wings breaking free from their prisons under his scapulae. Sobs tumbled out with his coughs. Oxygen became harder to gain as the seconds went on. His wings beat madly. They lifted him slightly, enough to bring him over to the windows. There, they set him down. He leant his forehead upon the cool glass, resting there. His breathing was loud and raspy. A few tears slid down his cheeks, leaving shining streaks on his skin.

His eyes moved along with the cars, the people, the birds; they followed whatever was in motion. His gaze eventually flew to the sky.

“I’m sorry,” he choked. “I didn’t for things to end up this way.”

His knees hit the glass.

“I never wanted this,” he spoke once more. “I really didn’t. I knew he wouldn’t be like the others, but I thought things would be fine. I’m sorry.” His fist hit the window. “I wish things wouldn’t be like this. I can’t watch him go. I can’t. I… I don’t want to do this. I know I have to, but it’s hard.

“I wish You were there. I wish You could’ve seen him when I did. I wish You see him now. He’s not ready. I don’t think he’ll ever be. He’s meant to be here. On Earth. This is his home. This is where he belongs,” Tyler stuttered out the last sentence.

“This,” he whispered, “wasn’t supposed to happen. Falling in love wasn’t supposed to happen.”

 

 


	6. chapter five

One more day.

One more day before this beautiful and so alive person would be gone. Tyler watched as Josh laughed at something that happened on television. Tyler admired the way his eyes lit up. the way the sunlight cast pretty shadows on his skin, the tattoos that crawled up his arm. Everything about Josh was so real and vibrant. It was weird to think of him in any other way.

Tyler was going to make it the best day of his life.

With nervous excitement and fear, Tyler gripped the key that Josh gave him tightly, holding it close to his heart, before inserting it into the lock. Quietly, Tyler entered Josh’s apartment. All needed ingredients were in a small sack that he held tightly. He shut the door and locked it before entering Josh’s kitchen. Quickly, he set up everything he needed to make pancakes. He made some actions complete themselves to speed up the process. Tyler heightened his hearing like he did on the second day he’d known Josh, so he could tell when the man was awake.

Tyler threw some bacon on the stove and stacked the completed pancakes on a nice plate. He carefully arranged common toppings on the counter. (He had to Google everything. It was harder than he thought, and by that he meant that it took him awhile to learn how to use Google.) When finished he focused on Josh’s room. Oh. Josh was awake. Tyler stopped the items that were making themselves and made it look like he had to focus on everything at the same time. Josh walked in a few seconds later, clad in nothing but loose basketball shorts. Tyler averted his eyes.

Josh’s eyes widened when he saw Tyler in his kitchen. His eyes widened even more when he saw his kitchen. “Ty… Tyler? What is this?”

Tyler grinned sheepishly. “I just wanted to do something nice for you. Have a pancake.”

Josh’s face split into a cheery grin. “Oh, man, thanks! Everything looks delicious.”

Tyler attempted to not look smug. “Really? Thank you. I hope they taste as good as they look.”

Josh shrugged. “Even if they weren’t all that good, I’d eat them.”

“Really? Why?” That’s not what humans normally do, is it?

“Because you made them. I just can’t seem to say no to you,” Josh poked Tyler’s cheek on his way to steal a piece of bacon.

Tyler smacked him with a dishtowel as he walked away, receiving only a laugh in response.

;;

They were lying in the soft grass when Tyler felt a hesitant hand in his. He looked over to be greeted by intense mocha eyes. He merely squeezed Josh’s hand. Josh smiled and turned to look back up at the clouds.

;;

“I really like this place,” Tyler commented from his spot on the couch at the cafe. “It’s nice and cozy.”

There was a sudden crash and the sound of a distressed Patrick wailing, “Pete!”

Tyler shrugged. “Cozy.”

Josh snorted.

;;

“I like your songs,” Josh said as he pulled a blanket over himself on Tyler’s couch.

“Thank you,” Tyler smiled.

“I really liked the one with the trees, and how you’re standing in them. I felt like I could relate in a weird sense,” Josh informed him.

Tyler froze. “Really?” He remembered the lyrics vividly. Especially the “I can feel my death” parts in particular. He sat down at the end of the couch, placing Josh’s feet in his lap. “That’s cool that you can relate.”

Josh nodded. “We really aren’t that different.” He wiggled his toes for a second before continuing: “I also like ‘Truce’. It was pretty. I liked all of them really.”

“Thank you,” Tyler whispered.

Three hours and four minutes.

Tyler could sense it. He was going to say for them to go do something, but he decided them being together was the best option. Now he just had to wait for Josh to do something leading to his—

“My work starts in three hours,” Josh suddenly spoke. “I have a job at this hidden record store across town. You can come with. For now, I think I’ll take a nap.”

Tyler nodded and began to run his fingers through Josh’s hair.

;;

Twelve minutes.

Tyler was in full-fledged panicking.

Internally, of course.

Josh was smiling at him, shaking him into reality, and Tyler smiled back before standing. “You’ve got to get to work, yeah.” His voice was scratchy. Josh nodded and grabbed Tyler’s hand.

On the way there, Josh began telling him more stories about all of his friends. Josh had released Tyler’s hand a block or two ago, and now was walking a bit ahead of Tyler, his words only slightly quieter. They were at a quiet intersection when all of a sudden it was just Josh in the middle of the road and a truck heading straight towards him.

That was when Tyler knew.

Josh had to die.

“No!” Tyler screamed, legs pushing him forward, shoving Josh out of the way, his wings breaking from their hiding place under his shoulder blades. “I’m sorry!” he cried before the truck hit him full-on. His entire body felt like it was on fire. Everything felt dulled. He could feel his vision darkening, and he allowed his eyes to close.

When his eyes opened, he wanted to throw himself back in front of the truck. He reached down and felt the smooth cloth of his robes; he heard his wings flapping leisurely. He smiled though because at least Josh was alive. Tyler looked out across the barren area around him until his eyes landed on Emanuel, standing a foot or so away from him. The angel was shaking his head at him. An apology broke through Tyler’s lips before he could stop himself. Emanuel merely continued to shake his head.

Tyler hung his head in shame, though he wasn’t sure if it was completely sincere. He didn’t exactly regret his actions.

“He’s disappointed in you,” Emanuel said. “He’s disappointed in your actions. You shouldn’t have saved Joshua. He was supposed to die. That is what He wanted.”

Tyler had felt his anger growing as Emanuel spoke. Finally, he snapped. “You know what, Emanuel? I don’t care what He thinks. I always listened to him. I’ve done everything he’s wanted me to do. Yes, I did not follow his orders this time, but I don’t care! I’ve done all these things for him and never once has he said, ‘Thank you!’ I’m so sick of it.”

“Your ‘thank you’, Tyler, is getting to serve Him!” Emanuel retorted. “That is the biggest thanks you could get. What more could you want?”

“A life with Josh!” Tyler shouted, shocking himself. His hands flew to his mouth as his eyes widened. Shakily, he brought his hands down. “A life with Josh,” he repeated, calmer.

Emanuel flapped his wings in anger. “You would trade a beautiful life, a beautiful relationship with Him for some pesky mortal who is supposed to be dead? I can’t believe this!”

Tyler’s wings also flapped, causing harsh winds to start around them. The angel’s cheeks were bright red, a crease forming between his eyebrows. “Yes! I would trade it actually! You wouldn’t understand. You don’t understand.”

Emanuel’s wings lifted him off of the ground. “You’re right. I don’t understand. But if that’s what you want!” Suddenly, he flew towards Tyler, elbows bent before shoving forwards, pushing Tyler into the pond behind him. Pushing Tyler down to the Earth below.

Tyler flailed madly for a second, his arms finally reaching upwards. He could see dark shadows across Emanuel’s face. He screamed for the angel to grab him, to pull him back up. He couldn’t be tossed out of his home, could he? He watched as the pond became blurred until it became blue sky and cloud. He watched as the Sun blinded him. He closed his eyes.

When he opened them, they landed on Josh’s face above him. Tyler released a loud gasp. Something felt off. He reached upwards, towards Josh. Said man released a choked sob. “Tyler. You’re okay. You’re okay. Tyler, you’re okay.” Tyler wearily nodded.

Josh gently pulled him into a proper sitting position. “You scared me so bad. How are you alive?”

Tyler couldn’t answer with anything other than an, “I’m sorry.” He stood up fully before turning to look at where he landed. Dark shadows in the shape of wings covered the road. He felt tears pool into his eyes. He reached behind him and gingerly felt his back. There was nothing there except smooth skin. He lost his wings. He held back a sob. His eyes rose to the sky. “I’m sorry.”

He felt a steady hand grip his tightly. He turned his head to look at Josh. Releasing a shaky breath, he collapsed into the man’s warm embrace. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

He kept rambling as Josh shushed him. Tyler leaned back in Josh’s arms before pressing his lips to Josh’s. Tyler felt himself loosen up. He pulled away softly. “I made a mistake, but I don’t regret it.”

Josh looked down at the ground, and Tyler didn’t know what he saw, but it might’ve been the same thing he’d seen because Josh abruptly met his gaze. “You saving me was the mistake, wasn’t it? You were an angel.”

Tyler nodded. “I was an angel.”

**Author's Note:**

> guess who turned this into a multi-chapter fic? that's right. i did. there are a lot more words. and more development. the fic is still "eh" b/c i just am not that great at this but oh well ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


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